Although people tend to focus on the many positive aspects of healthy relationships, it’s also important to address the bad—especially when negative behavior turns into toxicity and abuse. Relationship abuse can come in a variety of forms. In addition to physical abuse, there’s also emotional and psychological abuse which may be harder to recognize. We’ve come up with a list of some major signs of an unhealthy relationship.
Feeling distanced from the people you care about as a result of your relationship is a red flag. Perhaps they make you feel completely dependent on them or guilty about spending time with others. Regardless of how they do it, your partner should never make you feel isolated from your family, friends, and other close relationships.
While jealousy is natural and unavoidable in certain circumstances, it can also be toxic depending on how you or your partner manage the emotion. Jealousy is especially harmful when used as an excuse to act possessive, aggressive, or controlling. In addition, excessive jealousy can reveal a lack of trust which is poison in any relationship.
Deflecting responsibility and blame
When it comes to playing the blame game, everyone loses. Immediately deflecting the blame when confronted with an issue prevents you and your partner from listening to each other and resolving the problem together. Whether they’re putting the blame back on you, their past experiences, or someone else, failure to take responsibility for their actions is a bad sign.
Excessive arguing shouldn’t be confused with passion. Even if the arguments seem insignificant, frequent little spats could hint at a deeper problem. If you find yourselves constantly raising your voices at one another, you may have some unresolved communication issues.
Trying to change each other
Treating each other like projects rather than people spells disaster. Trying to mold your partner into your version of a perfect person isn’t fair to either of you. While everyone has areas they can improve on, trying to change major aspects of one another is a sign that you aren’t compatible.
If you or someone you know is in a physically, emotionally, or psychologically abusive relationship, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Free and confidential resources, such as the National Domestic Violence hotline, can provide you with the help and support you need to regain control of your life.
I am in an abusive relationship now and I hate to admit that I seem to be paralyzed to moving forward. I used to be strong and confident but now I feel like I am old and weak to anything that is said to me. I have been reading Joseph Prince books and it has helped me tremendously to begin to Love Myself again. I am getting to know why I am here and my purpose in this world and also the amount of love and concern and the Almighty’s will for my life. That’s what I call it it and when I can keep my head on straight I do well. Sometimes my anger takes me out of control. It’s getting easier.
Im in a relationship where my wife is always right if she doest want to sleep me its ok with. I dont any say in my marriage, pls help me
My fiance is constantly questioning my parenting ability. He feels like I’m doing it wrong and makes me feel terrible for the decisions I make and parenting my own child. Is this ever going to change? Is this toxic and should I get out?
This is highly a red flag. It is understood that some skills as a parent isn’t justifiable and arent always right. However, the help that you receive from someone regarding your child should not make you feel bad or put you down and if your fiance is making you feel so, then it’s time to have a talk. And if this talk leads to, “your not a good parent and what im doing for you kid is always right” kind of manner, then leave and put the engagement on pause. This is a sign of overly controlling behaviors that along the road will lead to emotional abuse. Such as, making you feel like a horrible mother to your kid, any descision thats made by your fiance is the only way to go without consulting you first, and on and on.
My boyfriend and I constantly fight. He twists his words in an argument, blames me for almost about everything and pretends as if he doesn’t suspect me. I hung out with a few coworkers after 12 after hanging out with my friends . And he was mad that I was not doing the right thing by coming home and not hanging out with my coworkers . I’m genuinely upset and exhausted with our relationship. These fights somehow happen when I be honest and tell what I did and how my evening went etc. My parents are in a loveless relationship built on hate, sorrow and anger . Idk what love truly is . And he blames me for not knowing what it is . And that I have a mental illness while I don’t. I cry myself to sleep sometimes . I’m just so confused.
In such a relationship, even if you see these signs, you try to reassure yourself that everything is okay. I had that situation and now I regret that it took me so long to make up my mind.